Rajeev Verma, Compiled & Written 4-July-2024
Some light hearted humour on old age
- Hate it when I see an old person and then realize we went to high school together.
- I told my husband he should embrace his mistakes… so he hugged me.
- My husband says I only have 2 faults. I don’t listen and something else….
- At my funeral, take the bouquet off my coffin and throw it into the crowd to see who is next.
- I thought growing old would take longer.
- I came, I saw, I forgot what I was doing, retraced my steps, got lost on the way back, now I have no idea what’s going on.
- The officer said, “You drinking?” I said, “You buying?” We just laughed and laughed….and now I need bail money.
- Day 12 without chocolate…lost hearing in my left eye.
- Scientists say the universe is made up of protons, neutrons and electrons. They forgot to mention morons.
- The adult version of “head, shoulders, knees and toes” is “wallet, glasses, keys and phone.”
- A dog accepts you as the boss… a cat wants to see your CV.
- Oops…. did I roll my eyes out loud?
- Life is too short to waste time matching socks.
- Wi-fi went down for five minutes, so I had to talk to my family. They seem like nice people.
- If you see me talking to myself, just move along. I’m self-employed and having a staff meeting.
- I won’t be impressed with technology until I can download food.
- Some people call me crazy. I prefer ‘happy with a twist’.
- My doctor asked if anyone in my family suffers from mental illness. I said, “No, we all seem to enjoy it.”
- I really don’t mind getting old, but my body is having a major fit.
- I told my husband I wanted to be cremated. He made me an appointment for Tuesday.
21. The world’s best antidepressant 4 legs, a wagging tail and comes with unconditional love.
- I’ve reached the age where my train of thought often leaves the station without me.
- If you’re happy and you know it, it’s your meds.
- I used to be able to do cartwheels – now I tip over, putting on my underwear!
Laughter is still the best Medicine!
RAJEEV VERMA 